Blair woke up, but his eyes didn't want to open. His head was pounding. He must have gotten thoroughly drunk last night if the hangover was any clue. There was too much light, and the angle was wrong. The bed felt wrong, too. Okay. He was not in his own bed. And there was definitely someone lying next to him. Someone large. Someone warm. Someone...not female.
Oh, God. When did he go into a bar and pick up a *guy*? He hadn't done that in years, not since...not since he realized that if he did, Jim could smell it on him, and he did not want to face Jim smelling like that. When did he even go to a bar? He tried to remember last night, despite the pain in his head.
Okay...he and Jim had left the station a little late. They'd stopped off for take-out because it was Thursday, and the agreement was that Thursday was take-out night. He remembered being amused that *Jim* had suggested getting vegetarian Indian that night. It was a little on the spicy side, at least for Jim, but there was India Pale Ale in the fridge, so that worked fine. And then he'd unpacked his back-pack to do some work while watching the game.
And there was that bottle of single-malt that his chairman had given him that day, saying she hated scotch. Jim took one look at it and his eyes just lit up. So, figuring that the beers during lunch didn't count, Blair got a couple of glasses and let Jim pour them each a shot.
It was the first time Blair had ever had twelve-year old single-malt. It was a revelation - smooth, smoky with a wonderful bite and an even better aftertaste. Better still was *Jim's* face. The man was in ecstasy. He'd taken the merest sip of his glass, but it seemed to be enough.
"Chief, this is incredible. I can taste everything - the malt, the grains, the water, the oak casks. It's so complex, but harmonious. Symphonic. I'm tasting music here, Sandburg." And he touched his tongue to the scotch again, and his face glowed again. Blair tossed off his shot to distract himself from that face. Jim just grinned and poured him another.
Blair didn't remember anything past that second shot of liquor. But he obviously hadn't gone to a bar the night before. After two shots of whisky, he was lucky he could stand up straight, and Jim never would have let him leave the loft...
Oh, God. He forced his eyes open, and then forced them to focus. They didn't want to do either. As soon as they did, he closed them again. He was in Jim's bed. And that was Jim next to him. And...he felt himself. Yep. He was naked. He peeked at Jim again. Jim had tossed off his covers. And, yes...and that was the most gorgeous butt Blair had ever seen. But he knew that...he'd coveted it for years.
Okay. He was lying in Jim's bed. With Jim. Naked. Now what? Oh, God. He couldn't think. What had happened the night before? He wasn't sticky or sore anywhere. Maybe it was perfectly innocent...maybe they'd started talking and he'd fallen asleep up there. Except he'd be wearing clothes, or at least underwear. He *never* slept naked. If it weren't for Jim now, he'd be freezing.
*Great going, Sandburg. You finally have your biggest fantasy, and you don't even know what you did.*
Okay...no matter what else, he had to get out of bed. Jim would *never* forgive him if he didn't get to the bathroom soon. He tried to stifle a groan as he made himself sit up. He didn't succeed, which meant that with Sentinel hearing, he might as well have shouted.
Jim groaned himself, turned to face Blair and opened his eyes. Blair braced himself for the reaction. It wasn't what he'd expected.
Jim's entire face lit up with the most brilliant smile he'd ever seen. "Good morning, angel."
Blair could only blink. Slowly. "A..angel?"
Jim nodded. "My beautiful Blair angel." Then...then he pulled Blair towards him and hugged him tenderly. This had to be a dream, except that he never had hangovers or an overly full bladder in dreams. "I've wanted to wake up like this for years."
Before Blair could form even coherent thoughts, let alone words, Jim bent to cover Blair's mouth with his own. He could feel his eyes widen with surprise, but then other feelings took over, and he went with them, exploring Jim's mouth with his tongue and Jim's body with his hands. If this were a dream, a strange, uncomfortable dream, he didn't want to wake up after all. Jim filled his arms perfectly, as he'd always known he would.
Then Blair moved his head again, and he groaned.
Jim chuckled, nuzzling Blair's hair. "That bad? I'm not surprised. You put away a lot of that whisky last night. You got pretty well plastered."
"I...I did?" Oh, God.
"I'm surprised you remember anything." Jim kissed behind Blair's ear.
"Ummm...that's good...ummm, well...actually..."
He pulled away. "You don't, do you?"
Blair shook his head carefully. "No! I seem to have missed something major...I don't remember anything since the second shot. Oh, my head..."
There was that smile again. "You were amazing last night. You drank six shots."
"Did I...sing?" That was a sign he was totally plotzed.
"Oh, yeah. Love songs, actually. And you changed all the names to Jim. I was touched. And then I was really touched. You were all over me."
"Oh, God. And that was...okay?"
"That was more than okay. That was...you tasted like that scotch plus you."
"I forgot our first kiss? Damn! Ow..."
"Looks that way." Jim shook his head. "I tried to persuade you to go to bed, but you insisted you wanted to be with me. Finally, I said you could sleep with me. I had to carry you upstairs."
"You...carried me?"
"Fireman's carry. We're lucky you didn't puke all over the stairs. You got your clothes off all by yourself. You know, that was the first time I'd ever seen you naked outside the locker room? God, you're beautiful. And you said it was rude of me to be dressed while you weren't, so I took off all my clothes, too. You really forgot all that?"
"Please. I'm embarrassed enough. My God, you could have killed me."
Jim grew serious. "Never, angel. Ever. I told you this last night before you passed out...I love you, Blair. I've loved you for years. I just...when you're in as deep as I am, it's hard to say anything - and I'm coward enough that I didn't want to risk losing you."
Blair barely heard the second part. "You...love me?"
"Yeah. Completely." He actually looked shy. "You said you loved me, too."
Blair nodded slowly. "I do. Completely...and you had me fooled. I even gave up guys so you wouldn't kick me out...We're a set."
"Yeah. But that's all in the past, Chief. Right?"
"Right...speaking of 'past'...did I...did we...did I forget something else? Something bigger than a first kiss?" He thought that he'd hate forgetting *that* more than he did forgetting the kiss.
Jim chuckled. "You certainly tried, but you were too far gone. Nothing happened. And judging from your moans and groans, nothing's going to happen now, either."
Blair grinned. It made his face hurt. "I can't even *think* about that now...but when I can, Ellison, your ass is *mine*."
Jim looked into his eyes, and smiled. "It always was, Sandburg."
Copyright 2000 Debra Fran Baker and NightRoads Associates
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